I Know Better Than You Do
Scripture tells us to pray without ceasing (1 Thessalonians 5:17). Why? Why do we need to pray without ceasing? Why can’t we just pray about something once and be done with it? Why do we need to pray about it over and over again? Does God not listen the first time? Is He hard of hearing or something? Does He not understand what we are asking the first time? Does it take Him a little while to process our requests maybe? Of course not!
The fact that scripture asks us to pray persistently and fervently leads me to believe that our prayers are not always going to be answered right away. So, if we know that our prayers may not always be answered right away, why do we get so upset when it seems like our prayers are not being answered? More importantly, is it really that God is not answering our prayers, or is it that we do not like the answer that He is giving us?
As humans, we often feel like we know best about everything…especially when it comes to ourselves. We like to be right, and no one is going to tell us what to do or think. So, what happens when that little pride goblin within us has a collision with the wisdom and omniscience of God? We don’t tend to like it very much, and we tend to start making excuses or trying to explain it away. I have been there many, many times. I have prayed and prayed and prayed about something, and when the Lord finally answers, instead of relief, I am uncomfortable. After multiple prayers asking for wisdom or direction, the Lord finally gives it to me, and I’m like, “Hold up. I have questions.”
In my experience, God rarely answers my prayers the way that I want Him to or think He should. I basically get told no a lot. It was hard at first. My first instinct used to be to think that God just wasn’t answering my prayers. I tried to explain it away that way because I had a hard time believing that He could possibly have a better plan for me than the one that I had for myself. I mean, it couldn’t possibly be that God would be telling me no right? Why on earth would He do that? I knew myself better than anyone else. I knew what was best for me, didn’t I? I had to come to terms with the fact that I did not, in fact, know myself better than anyone else. He knew me better than I even knew myself.
Accepting the fact that God knows me better than even I do and that He knows what is best for me more than I do did not make getting a no from Him any easier. I still didn’t like it, and it still made me uncomfortable. Truth be told, I didn’t want to do things His way. His way was hard. His way was uncomfortable. His way often pushed me to my breaking point. Even today, doing things God’s way is hard, uncomfortable, and often tests my limits. Why is that? Because endurance training sucks. Because admitting when we are wrong is hard. Because one of the most trying things that we can ever do is learn how to trust.
When we get a no from God, we can expect a lesson to follow. Sometimes, it is a lesson in perseverance. Sometimes, it is a lesson in humility. Sometimes, it is a lesson in vulnerability. I don’t think that I could name a single person that would chase after any of those lessons willingly. Those are hard lessons to learn. Those are the lessons that push us out of our comfort zones. They require faith, and they require a strength that we can only get from God Himself.
I have had my Jonah moments. I have run from answers to prayer from God that I was not comfortable with. I have had my Gideon moments. I have received answers to prayer from God and then “tested” Him to make sure that it was really Him that was speaking to me because the things that He was asking me to do just sounded crazy. I just had one of those moments a couple of weeks ago actually, and I had to text some friends and ask them to pray for confirmation for me because God was “up to some sketchy stuff in my prayer time” that morning. I seriously said that to these friends. I have had my Peter moments. I have argued with God that what He was saying could never possibly happen only to experience it happening very shortly after our argument. I have had my Jacob moments. I have wrestled with God over His answer to my prayers in the past. I have had my Job moments. I have stood and yelled at God, questioned why He wasn’t answering me, and demanded that He move the way that I wanted Him to.
I am human. I am full of pride. I have a sinful nature. I like to be right and don’t want to have to admit that I am wrong sometimes. I like to be comfortable. I don’t enjoy being pruned. I like to be in control of my life. Faith scares me sometimes. I question God sometimes. I struggle with trust from time to time. I forget that I can’t see the whole picture, but He can. I don’t always prioritize well. I tend to let other things get in front of God. I don’t like to be vulnerable. I like to think that I am strong on my own. I like to believe that I can handle everything on my own. I am impatient. I am stubborn. I am rebellious. I don’t like to be told what to do. I tend to see rules as challenges. I am not great at self-control sometimes. I like to live in the grey area. I tend to rationalize things to twist them to go in my favor. I am lazy. I am selfish. I want what I want when I want it.
These are the reasons that I do not like to be told no by God. These are the reasons that I still have a hard time being asked to wait by God as well. Maybe you can relate. If so, I can tell you that, from my experience, it does get easier. I haven’t gotten to a place where it is never hard to hear those responses from God, and I don’t know that I ever will to be honest. I think if those answers ever become easy to take all the time, then there will be no more opportunity or need for growth, and I don’t believe that anyone can ever accomplish that during their time on earth. Maybe I am wrong. Only time will tell, I guess.